


Untitled Sestina: John

by bironic



Series: Sestinas by bironic [6]
Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Gen, Poetry, Sestina
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-04-02
Updated: 2008-04-02
Packaged: 2017-10-03 12:44:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bironic/pseuds/bironic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In his head, the city whispers, <i>Be lost no longer, child of the Ancestors</i>; says, <i>These sleeping halls you call alien were made for you, have been waiting for you</i>; says, <i>Welcome home</i>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Untitled Sestina: John

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers for "Rising."
> 
> Big thanks to beta-readers, especially roga and jadesfire2808, for encouraging me not to give up and for pointing out the clunky parts.

When John first steps through the gate into Atlantis,  
he doesn't feel afraid or excited or humbled or lost,  
doesn't wonder what he's doing so far from home  
in this dark and silent city at the bottom of an alien  
sea. Blank and efficient, he secures the area for the civilian team.  
It's his job; that's all. Until, beneath his boots, the city wakes.

As the lights flicker on, white and blue as the sea, it's as if John wakes  
too; as if the gene, long dormant, stirs to life along with Atlantis,  
humming warm in his chest, kindling a tentative joy reflected in the team's  
awestruck faces around him. In his head, the city whispers, _Be lost_  
_no longer, child of the Ancestors_; says, _These sleeping halls you call alien  
were made for you, have been waiting for you_; says, _Welcome home_.

The city's siren song follows him even when he leaves this perhaps-home  
to save it from drowning. It bears witness as he shoots his C.O. and wakes  
the thousand shrieking horrors who dominate this nightmarish alien  
food chain. It greets him when he returns in sudden command of Atlantis,  
risen from the sea. It's comforting, but it's weird. He feels pretty damn lost.  
Not that he'll admit it; a leader now, he needs to stay strong for his team.

Soon, the scientists and doctors as well as the soldiers become his team,  
just as this ancient city on a faraway sea somehow becomes the home  
he hasn't let himself have in years. On Earth, he'd believed he could never be lost  
without a home to miss. Now, he lets the shushing waves soothe him when he wakes  
from formless dreams of Wraith and death and desert sands. Atlantis  
thrums a lullaby until he drifts off beneath stars that no longer seem alien.

In time, he loses the ability and the desire to distinguish "human" and "alien."  
It's the same with Elizabeth, Teyla, Rodney, Ronon, grown closer than a team;  
they're his family. He'd give his life for any of them, and for Atlantis,  
this city of misfits from two galaxies, their oasis on the sea, their forever home.  
They've celebrated too many victories, grieved through too many wakes,  
to be anything else. Together, they shoulder the weight of all they've won and lost.

On the reverse trip, gating to Earth, John is immediately, nauseatingly lost.  
The crowds, the strip malls, the fast food joints, present an utterly alien  
culture that drives him to his silent, bare apartment, where he waits to wake  
from this dream. All that anchors him are daily phone calls from his team,  
similarly at sea on this bustling, blessedly ignorant planet he'd called home.  
At meetings, at mealtimes, at midnight, all he can think of is Atlantis.

John wakes early on their last day of leave. Gathering his team,  
each one human and alien in their own way, he flies them home,  
soaring over the sea to the glittering spires of the once-lost city of Atlantis.


End file.
